A couple of weeks ago I went to an evening event at Cal Poly State University in San Luis Obispo with Ann Coulter. For those who don’t know her: She is a successful author, accomplished speaker and Fox News commentator, and you either love her or hate her. She is the “real deal,” which means she lets everybody know what she is thinking and feeling – with no exceptions. For me she is a masterpiece of authenticity for several reasons:
Ann speaks up even though she might be stepping on somebody’s toes (this happens all the time). Her honesty is mind-blowing and she says things you would rather not hear. Nevertheless, she speaks up because this is who she is and she cannot help but be herself. Her looks are stunning and if you think that a woman in her 50’s cannot wear short skirts, she will prove you wrong. Ann blows into the room like a whirlwind (not just a breeze), her long blond hair revealing femininity is stunning and deceiving at the same time. If you think you are talking to a blonde “girly” you are so wrong. It won’t take you more than 2 seconds to figure out that this woman is as tough as they come, yet she retains her femininity.
This is not a homage to Ann Coulter, but a call for more authenticity among women. You don’t have to agree with Ann’s politics and her style, but you can still learn a lot from her. The biggest lesson is this: Being authentic takes guts and having guts is reflected in how you show who you really are.
Don’t misunderstand. You should not try to copy Ann or somebody’s style or way of being. Instead, work on your own authenticity and being. Women often take the role of the pleaser. We don’t want to disappoint and we don’t want to show what we really feel or think. Women often hide and play the roles they feel they need to play to make things or their relationships work. We want others to like us and we want others to include us. Will others still like me when they know what I really think? Who cares? Would you rather be loved and respected for who you really are or for who you pretend to be?
The answer to me is a no-brainer. I want to be loved and respected for who I am. I have weaknesses and edges, but I have a lot to give. So do you! Don’t question yourself and allow others to consistently question you. Begin to embrace who you really are and let the world know who this person is.
You will make new friends and maybe lose some old friends. You will make many people happy while disappointing others, but one thing is certain, you will never be disappointed about yourself and you will never question who you are. That is the “real deal,” because you can rely on what really matters: YOU.
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Yes, great, so true!
Isn’t there anybody out there who disagrees with me? I chose Ann Coulter being aware that she is a bold example. The way she expresses her heartfelt opinion is often hurtful to others (probly even intended) I enjoyed meeting with her in person and her “style” did not threaten me. On contrary I was deeply impressed by her presence and authenticity. Nevertheless I understand the discussions about her being too aggressive and blunt.